Numbers 17 - A Thankful, Trusting Heart

Watch out toes...

I am just this week dealing with a situation. Something I really felt needed to be done in this situation for me personally and professionally caused more work for someone else in my life. I don't think this person fully understands why I had to do this and probably feels like I put the choice before God and a commitment I had made. On the other hand I can see how my choice made things more difficult for them. Right now there just seems to be a lot of grumbling and complaining about it from both sides.

Not one of us is perfect.

God always provides a way.

So many times I catch myself grumbling. Grumbling is a direct reflection of my lack of trust and faith in God.

As a Christian when I complain or grumble it is like I am telling God that what he has provided is not good enough. I am also sending the message to others (including non-believers) that what I have is mediocre. Not good enough. Less than what I deserve.

Any Veggie Tales fans out there? Madame Blueberry?

A thankful heart is a happy heart. Be glad for what you have, it's an easy way to start.

YES! YES and YES!

Today I am going to be more mindful of my grumbling. I don't want God to hear these statements in my mind and heart whispering that what he provides is less than I deserve.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UhcI-HXicwY

Numbers 15 & 16 - Reflection on Sin

Um, wow. I totally don't remember reading this. I know I have before but must have forgotten. What a HUGE reminder this morning that God don't play.

The earth just opened up and swallowed them. Everyone. Women, children, all of the possessions.

I sit here imagining the people who really did nothing wrong but were swallowed up. It really seems so unfair but when you think about it, this happens all of the time.

How many times in our lives do we see innocent people affected by sin.

Addictions - gambling, alcohol, drugs, sex, shopping, food

Crimes - theft, murder

But what about the sins that aren't big now but start out small? Are you glued to your phone checking social media and not investing in those around you? Are you lying to your spouse about the price of something you bought. Maybe you made it more "on sale" than it actually was. Maybe you were too friendly with a co-worker and it turned into "harmless" flirting but led to nothing else, yet. Are you gossiping? I tell you friends. this is has been a HUGE one for me. Since I have left one school to begin another, I really see how gossip really had a hold on me.

Sin affects not only you but those around you. It is easy to see on the news and on true crime shows but we have to look at OUR life and see how our sin is hurting or will eventually hurt others in our lives.

I am so thankful for a God who forgives and shows grace and mercy. I know I will be in prayer right now asking for just that. I don't want to be swallowed up by what now seems like small sin but could become a huge problem in the future.

Numbers 13 & 14 - Mission Trip to Dollar Tree

While I read these 2 chapters and completed my study guide, I do want to talk about an encounter I was blessed to have today.

I will be really honest in saying that we are on a VERY tight budget right now. I know the Lord will provide for our needs as he always does. This is just temporary. We have several big expenses right now and just don't want to over do it.

Today I was in the Dollar Tree. It was pretty busy for 11:30 and there was only one cashier. I kept seeing this one group of teens who had special needs. I had seen them for the first time in the parking lot as I walked in. They were with 2 women. I am not certain if they were adopted, in foster care, part of a group home...All I know is that the women were so kind and patient with them. I watched them as I stood in the long line at the check out, mildly annoyed because they were out of helium and I needed a balloon. 

The teens were so polite, so well behaved. It was clear that they had $1 each to spend. The one boy had some kind of animal figure that would expand when you put it in water. The women was explaining to him that "it is small now, but it will be big later when we put it in water". The 3 girls had earbuds, a water bottle and a journal. As I was standing there I tapped the women on the shoulder and said "let me buy this stuff for you". 

Her face looked confused. She asked me why and I just told her that I would like to pay for the items. Another women directly behind me grabbed me and gave me a huge hug. She said she had just in that moment heard about a subway shooting and that there was at least one nice person left in this world. 

I didn't really say much the entire time this was all going on. One of the teens said "God has really blessed us today". No sweet boy, God blessed me today. I continued in silence which is odd because y'all know I am a talker. I swiped my debit card, paid and simple told them to have a nice day. 

God silenced my talky talk. He wanted me to hear. He wanted me to connect with his people in a different way today. He had provided me with the $14 to pay for their stuff. He allowed me to see that people need me to be Jesus. They needed to see him in me. 

I walked out to my van that has almost 200,000 miles on it, drove away and cried like a big ol' baby. 

While my bank account is not overflowing, my heart is. God provides. He puts me in places where I need to be. He loves his people. Just like he loves the Israelite's who can't seem to get it right.

I am very thankful for that little mission trip to the Dollar Tree today. It was beautiful and I am truly grateful for being there and to have been clearly, without a doubt, used by God in that checkout line. 

Now to stop complaining in my mind about what I don't have and fall on my knees in praise and adoration to Him! 

Numbers 10, 11, 12 - Long Arms, Tons of Quail

Ok, so this is totally not like me to be sooooooooo far behind. I hate having to post messages about not having time to post. The reality is that I am putting other things first. Moving to my new classroom, grad school, my bag business, Facebook, naps...I am just being honest.

But here I am, reading these 3 chapters and seeing what God has for me to hear.

When reading these chapters I am reminded of the complaining Israelite's. Nothing ever seemed to be good enough for them. They wanted good food, not manna. I love, love, love how God asks in 11:23, "Is the Lord's arm too short?"...  And then I am reminded of my own complaining and excuses.

Don't we do this ALL OF THE TIME? We put limits on him and what he can do for us. Ladies, His power is greater that we can even begin to fathom. He had the Israelite people 3 feet deep in quail. That was almost 2 tons of birds! Stop right now and think about your Thanksgiving Turkey. I will give you a minute. Now imagine walking out into your yard and wading through 3 feet of bird. Wow!

I have been limiting God in the area of time management this week. I have been missing His voice, His blessings and the peace that can come only from Him.

Where would we be if we really believed that God's arms were not too short? I am challenging myself as well as you to ask God do move in big ways in your life. But here is the hard part, you have to be in prayer, in his word, in fellowship with him and live your life for him. Daily.

Let's stop limiting him and start receiving abundant blessings from our Heavenly Father.

Numbers 7. 8 and 9 - Alive and Able

This week the struggle has been real. Coming off of vacation, starting new eating habits, really pushing it at the gym and being somewhere by 7:45 each morning has been overwhelming. Not to mention all of the grocery shopping, chores and errands. It is 6:19 and I am asking myself, how in the world am I going to make it this morning?

Today I must look to the Lord for his strength, call on him and ask according to his will. Even though my tiredness and weariness this week isn't really a big deal compared to what is going on all around me, God cares. I think that too many times in my life I feel that what I am facing is not important to anyone but me. Not true. God cares about me, every part of me. He cares about every detail of my life.

There have been so many disturbing stories of tragedy this week. It has been hard to see the good in these events. I love the quote from Mr. Rodgers about looking for the helpers. Even if you can't help in this situation, look for ways you can help where you are right now. As tired and weary as I am today, I will still get up in the morning and plan on volunteering at a local food bank.

Tired. Weary.
Alive. Able.

Have a wonderful day sweet friends!

Numbers 6 - Where do you find peace?

Long ago, back in 1998, a certain sweet husband of mine threw a pillow at me and hit my sweet newlywed self right between the eyes. I want to remember that we were arguing but I am not certain. I do remember wanting a divorce. Yes, it was over. The fairy tale was no longer.

I am not kidding.

I was hurt, mortified, shocked and OVERREACTING.

The truth is that I put all I had into Jeffrey. If he was mad at me my stomach would be in knots. If he gave me the silent treatment, I would beg for him to talk to me. I felt unloved and unwanted when we were at odds. All of this was my own making. I had put all that I was on how Jeffrey treated me and loved me. I had unfairly made Jeffrey a god of sorts. Much of this had to do with the distorted view of relationships I had experienced as a child.

Jeffrey being happy and in love with me validated me. It was where I looked for peace and protection. This was not fair to Jeffrey, me and most importantly God.

I have learned so much about relationships over the years. I have grown so much in my relationship with Jeffrey, my girls, friends and God. Putting my trust in God and finding peace in his protection has become my comfort, not anything anyone on this earth can or could ever give me.

Today I am praising God for transforming that dramatic 21 year old who found her self-worth and self-esteem as measured by others into a women who finds her peace and worth from Jesus Christ.

Beautifully broken, finding peace in Him.

Numbers 5 - Honor in Marraige

It took me a long time to realize who I needed to be in my marriage. I was often busy trying to fix Jeffrey. Instead, I needed to fix myself. I often saw lots of faults in him and very little in me.

After 18 years I have learned lots of valuable lessons. Here are a handful...

I have to show him respect.
I have to listen to him.
He gives me no reason not to trust him.
It is not beneficial to talk trash about him to friends and family when I don't agree with him.
Going to bed angry is sometimes good.
I have to hold my tongue but also stick up for what I feel is right.

The last sentence is interesting. As my trust, respect, and love for Jeffrey has grown over these years I rarely have concerns about what he is doing for our family. He does what he genuinely feels is best for me so I put full trust in him. If he is wrong, I forgive. We are a team. We work together for the good of us and for the good of our family.

Marriage is not perfect. I am not perfect. He is not perfect. Our kids are not perfect.

In 1998 I saw my marriage as a fairy tale. I had preconceived notions of what love, our home, conversations, sex, finances and the over all relationship should be. Once I let go of all of those, my marriage became more than I ever imagined it could be. The earthly ideas of marriage were replaced by biblical truths about how I should live my life and honor my marriage.

Today, in this season, my life with Jeffrey is pretty amazing. I know as time goes by, the seasons will change. I know that our strong foundation of trust, love and respect for one another will help us face the storms of life.

I am starting a new bible study at the end of the month through Proverbs 31 Ministry. It is about bettering your relationship with your husband. I encourage you to join me on this short study. I know God will use it to better my relationship even more.

Numbers 3 and 4 - 8,580 Men and No Truck

Have you ever moved?

I have.

Georgia to Rock Hill 1998
Rock Hill to another apartment in Rock Hill 1999
Rock Hill to Columbia 2000
Columbia to our new house 2001

I have not moved in 15 years. The next time I move will be a huge mess. I have a attic full of treasures and closets full of stuff.

I do remember wrapping all of my wedding china and valuables carefully. I wrapped them in the finest newspaper one could find. We didn't allow these things on the moving truck. Jeffrey took them in the car each time we moved. He took special care not to break or damage these items that were really important to me.

I also remember packing the rest of our wares. At the beginning I was careful to sperate items by room and carefully pack each item. By the end of the days of packing I was just throwing stuff in boxes. Have you ever been there?

Another memory I have is when we hired a moving company to move us into our home from the apartment. All of the other times we had moved ourselves. We were big shots now. We hired Two Men and a Truck. I can remember my family taking extra care moving our furniture. I don't feel like we got the same from the moving company.

My family understood the value of the furniture. They knew the importance, the history. The movers did not. They banged and bumped. They were more concerned about the timeline than the items they were moving. They did not take the same care that my family did.

God was very specific in who he chose to move the tent of meeting and all of its contents. There was great detail in how the items were to be wrapped and how they were to be transported.

I really don't ever remember reading very much of Numbers before. I am rejoicing this morning that my God is once again revealed to be a God of meticulous detail.

Lord, thank you for being a God of detail. Thank you for caring so much for even the smallest, most mundane parts of my day. Lord help me to see you throughout today. Help me to share your awesomeness with those I meet. Help me focus on the small details of your word that I may sometimes read over quickly. Thank you for your care of every part of my day and every detail of my life. Amen.

Numbers 2 - God is in every detail.

Many are the plans in a person's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails. Proverbs 19:21

God is in every detail in our lives. Just as he was specific in how he ordered the tribes and how they were to march, he has specific work he is doing in us.

Before my faith deepened I use to fear this. Now I find great comfort in it. I am so thankful that my God has it all under control. He orders my steps. He knows what I need. He puts me where I need to be to execute his plan.

I am very thankful that God is a God of order and detail. I can spend time busying myself making plans for my life and for my families life but His truth is that his purpose will prevail. I need only trust in Him.

Numbers 1 - Faithfulness

This morning I rolled out of bed, put on my swimsuit and went out to get my towel off of the balcony and guess what? It was pouring down rain.

I had so much faith that I would be at the beach, in my chair, watching the sunrise.

It was a great segue into what I would be studying in Numbers this morning. So many times I put my faith in me, not what God has planned. Even with something as little as the rainy first morning at the beach. I was so sure that what I had planned was going to be.

In this first chapter we see that a census was taken of all of the men in Israel, except for the tribe of Levi. They were set apart. They were chosen to move the temple and take care of all aspects of it due to their faithfulness.

We also see the fulfillment of God's promise to Abraham. The tribe of Judah was the largest. Judah the 4th son of Jacob. Jacob the soon of Issac, Issac the son of Abraham. What a beautiful fulfillment in those numbers.

It is also important to remember some things about Moses. If you have the study guide this is found on pages 3-4.

He was raised by someone other than his parents.
He murdered a guard that beat an Israelite.
He was 80 when his ministry started.
He has a speech problem and had a confidence problem.
He never entered the promise land due to disobedience to God.


God is in control of every detail. Now the sun is shining even though the weatherman said rain all day. Thank you God for this teachable moment today. You are in control.

Acts 28 - Be Bold

"He proclaimed the kingdom of God and taught about the Lord Jesus Christ - with all boldness and without hindrance." Acts 28:31

Today I will walk out of my school after 4 years of teaching my sweet 3 year olds. I am sure it will be a tad emotional. I will really miss a lot of the people there.

As I reflect on my 4 years there I hope that I have encouraged and loved people there. My ministry to my students and parents has been a beautiful one. It is hard to see why God has called me to leave but I am trusting in him.

I have prayed with friends in that building, shared verses, encouraged those in need... I have seen my students leave special ed and excel in the general setting.

God has blessed these 7 years in preschool. There have been choppy waters but He has always provided a way to safety.

I am looking forward to what He has planned for me. My summer prayers and focus will be focused on Acts 28:21

Be bold!
Don't be hindered!
Proclaim the Kingdom of God!

Happy Summer teacher friends!
LBNE peeps, please know that I love you and will miss you dearly.

I will be blogging from the Outer Banks next week. I am looking forward to experiencing the wonders of God through His creation. I can hardly wait to see what he is going to reveal to me through the book of Numbers.

Acts 27 - Dear Friend

Dear Sweet Friend,

I know that you are in the midst of a storm right now. In fact, you have been in this storm for quit some time.

As I read Acts 27, I am encouraged for you. I know that what may seem like many dark nights on that ship in that treacherous storm will not be for naught.

I have watched you as you have battled the wind, rain and darkness. I have seen the hurt, disappointment and sadness. I have seen you wanting to give up. I have seen you want to just walk away.

My sister in Christ, let me reassure you that even though your lifeboat drifted away, God has been there all along. Keep your courage. You will reach the land safely, just like Paul.

I don't know if you are saved. I pray today that if you are not, you will be. I pray God's blessings upon you. I pray that He will protect you, lead you, guide you and keep you. I pray that this storm you are in will calm. I pray His peace upon you, a peace that can only come through Him.

Keep your head up. Face this with courage. Pray. Let Him work in your life.

God loves you and so do I.

Your Friend,
Mandey

Acts 26 - Here I am. Use me!

Paul was not backing down. He was sure of Jesus. Sure of the calling on his life. Sure that he could win these people over for Christ.

When I read about Paul in this Chapter I think about those who have been martyred. I think about those who would not back down from the word of God even when faced with death.

It is sometimes easy to forget about those who are spreading the gospel in dangerous situations around the world when we are so comfortable in our cozy homes and churches.

Why is it so hard for me to share my faith with others when the opportunity arises? Even after all I have learned and know, I still feel nervous and hesitate at times.

A friend has encouraged me by hosting a neighborhood bible study. I am going to spend this summer opening up my home to reach my neighbors. Every Sunday I see cars parked in driveways, people doing yard work, blinds closed...Here is my summer mission field. My own backyard.

It is uncomfortable. I feel vulnerable. It is risky.

I do know that God will honor my efforts. He has a plan. His will will be done.

How can you step out like Paul? For some it may be sticking your toes in the baby pool and for others it may be jumping off into the deep end. How can God use you this summer?

I wanted to thank each one of you for your continuous support of my ministry here and encourage you to add friends to this page. Lost friends. Friends that may scoff at the idea. Pray about who God would want you to invite. I know I will be in prayer for people to come here who don't know Jesus. I pray that God will use these words to encourage us believers as well as unbelievers.

I pray that my eyes will be open this summer. Join me!

Open the Eyes of My Heart